Gaga For Lulu

…and I am too tired to even care!!!

Why was it 40 degrees today? What the hell? It was 80 degrees last week and now it is April and we are wearing bulky ass winter jackets. Oh well, I still took The Tribe to a local playground to meet some friends. I think my snot was honestly frozen to my face and my big ol’ ass was numb. They had fun though.

The Boss needed today. She has been having a rough time lately. She has been crying constantly. Before and After school. During dinner, getting dressed, doing homework, playing with her sisters. She has been exhausting all of our patience and energy. I feel like we are working so damn hard to make her smile and laugh. It really is’t fair to the other 2, but we are truly worried about The Boss.

The Big Guy and I have tried every tactic we know to get to the bottom of things. She just hasn’t been herself. We even had a conference with her teacher and got this freakin’ reply from the teacher, “K is a great student. She is my favorite this year. She is so smart, respectful, quiet and has all the friends in the world. She makes teaching fun and if I have a daughter, I want her to be just like K”.

We were dumb founded. I said a modest thank you and was even more frustrated and puzzled. The Boss cries every AM from what her clothes look like, to her glasses, shoelaces, book-bag and “ugly” eyes. I swear to god, if I ever find out who has made her feel like this at the age of 6, I will do some bodily harm.

We have examined our parenting style, even invited friends and family to critique us to make sure we were not in some way influencing K in a negative way. Oh, being a mommy and daddy is so damn hard sometimes. I wish I could just hug and kiss her and make everything better. I know it is how she perceives situations and verbalizations but she is only 6 years old. That scares me.

The Big Guy and I have each had recent “break downs” over the situation. Of course, not in front of The Boss or the younger 2, but it is really making us anxious, nervous and has left us feeling guilty in some way. As ya’all know I am on an antidepressant, but The Big Guy is as well (he is open with this like I, and knows I write about it, so relax! LOL). Did we “mess” her up in some way? Is it our god awful genetics that has done this to her? Why does she have to feel like this at 6 years old? It is not fair.

The Boss had a good day, only 2 episodes of inconsolable crying and we were able to calm her down within 45 minutes. Which is better than an hour and a half. But you never want to hear your child say she doesn’t like herself, or thinks she is ugly, kids don’t like her, and feels so sad and doesn’t know why. It just takes your heart and snaps it in freakin’ half!

I love those kids to death. as soon as you have the little snot noses, your heart is worn on the outside of your body and you feel every emotion that they do 10 fold. So yeah, she needed a good day with some old friends at the playground, even if it was so could our snot was freezing on our faces and the port a pot “liquid” was frozen. Flippin’ foul! LOL.

Wow, I really rambled on. I feel so damn worn out. And just one more question. Why the hell is the price of living in Maryland so damn high? I mean come on, you can’t get a decent 4 bedroom house without shelling out a small fortune. Don’t get me wrong, we have a great 4 bedroom house with a pool on a nice piece of property, but we are always looking for more land, couple acres. Don’t even get me started on taxes and electric and water bill. $500 a month for electric and $450 quarterly for water. What the shit are these people thinking. I need a money tree!!!!! LOL!!

This entry was posted on Monday, April 9th, 2007 at 10:07 pm and is filed under Gaga For Lulu, Family Life, The Boss, The Big Guy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.