Wow, am I in a shitty mood today. I do not even like myself this afternoon. The kids have been really rotten for the last few days, I haven’t been sleeping at night, my joints are aching like I am 80 years old, there is absolutely no sex what so ever going on in our house, I am feeling overwhelmed with juggling 100 duties, I am bloated and the ol’ taters are a size bigger than usual. Come the hell on, my boobs should not have to feel like this, along with the “fake” bloating feeling in my belly area, after a total hysterectomy. Seriously people!

Ugh!!! Not to mention my stupid ass blood sugars are all f’ed up. No one seems to care about that one but me. The Dr’s will fit me in. Yeah, in a month. After I have a big fat heart attack and develop crazy ass complications from uncontrolled sugars. But so be it. I could hardly drive home from Target this afternoon when my blood sugar was…. 459. Shit, shit shit!

It just makes you feel crappy and stupid. I know too much, but can’t fix the problem. I obviously need some new medication. For my diabetes, not my head. Although if you ask The Big Guy right now he will tell you I need that too. He has taken the girls outside to play on the play-set while he fiddles with the pool, because apparently men get to do whatever the shit they want, whenever they want to do it. Uh huh, like come home and take the ever so famous 30 minute crap, then go outside and ponder the pool water, then play with the dogs, then watch tv, then play around on the computer, then take another 30 minute shit, then lay there and snore so loud that I can’t sleep. I told you I was in a bad mood.

But he is outside because, “he doesn’t want to be anywhere near me right now”. Which by the way, makes me feel so loved. He doesn’t understand that I am scared to death about my diabetes and the fact that now I am facing the ol’ insulin, so damn scary, and that I feel like shit and overwhelmed about all that I have going on, not that I hate it. I love all of it, but it is just busy right now. And he said he would help more, and guess what? He isn’t.

I feel a little better now after ranting. Oh boy, what a day! For any of you that made it this far in my over the top bitching and moaning, thanks. At least I got it out of my system. By the way, I even cried the whole time writing so I feel refreshed and able to take some more shit. Yee ha, bring it on baby! Haha :).

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 17th, 2007 at 7:14 pm and is filed under Family Life, The Big Guy, Opinions and Thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.